5 day Ab Challenge: Day 5

300 Abs

30 Crunches

Lie on your back on the floor. Bend your knees. Your feet can be flat on the floor, or you can keep them suspended in the air during your crunches for a little extra crunch.Cross your arms in front of your chest. Your head and neck should be resting on your hands. Lift your shoulders towards the ceiling using your abdominal muscles and pause at the peak. It is very important not to lift your entire back off the floor, When y our shoulders are off the ground, pause and hold that position for a full second (or more).

20 Bicycles Crunches

Lie flat on the floor with your lower back pressed to the ground and contract your core muscles.With your hands gently holding your head, lift your knees to about a 45-degree angle. Slowly, at first, go through a bicycle pedal motion.Alternately touching your elbows to the opposite knees as you twist back and forth.

30 Vertical Toe Touches

Stretch out on the ground. Legs vertical. Arms wide open and palms facing the ceiling.Raise your trunk keeping your legs as firmly as possible in the same position.Try to touch the outside of your ankles with your fingers.

20 Reverse Crunches

Lie on the floor and place hands on the floor or behind the head.

Bring the knees in towards the chest until they're bent to 90 degrees, with feet together or crossed. Contract the abs to curl the hips off the floor, reaching the legs up towards the ceiling. Lower and repeat for 1-3 sets of 12-16 reps.It's a very small movement, so try to use your abs to lift your hips rather than swinging your legs and creating momentum

15 Side Plank Hip Lifts (R)

Lie on right side, left foot crossed over right, right elbow under shoulder, and left hand on hip. Press into right forearm and raise right hip and thigh off ground. Lower hip without touching mat, then lift again.

30 Crunches

Lie on your back on the floor. Bend your knees. Your feet can be flat on the floor, or you can keep them suspended in the air during your crunches for a little extra crunch.Cross your arms in front of your chest. Your head and neck should be resting on your hands. Lift your shoulders towards the ceiling using your abdominal muscles and pause at the peak. It is very important not to lift your entire back off the floor, When y our shoulders are off the ground, pause and hold that position for a full second (or more).

15 Side Plank Hip Lifts (L)

Lie on right side, left foot crossed over right, right elbow under shoulder, and left hand on hip. Press into right forearm and raise right hip and thigh off ground. Lower hip without touching mat, then lift again.

20 Bicycles Crunches

Lie flat on the floor with your lower back pressed to the ground and contract your core muscles.With your hands gently holding your head, lift your knees to about a 45-degree angle. Slowly, at first, go through a bicycle pedal motion.Alternately touching your elbows to the opposite knees as you twist back and forth.

40 Russian twists

Start out sitting on the floor with your knees bent so that you can place your feet flat on the ground. Lean back so that your body is in a 45-degree angle,, while keeping your back straight. Raise your feet up until your lower legs are parallel to the floor. Balancing your weight on your glutes, bend your elbows and clasp your hands together in front of your chest. Twist your torso to the right side and try to bring your hands as close as you can to the floor. Move only your upper body while keeping your abdominals engaged throughout the motion. Finally, twist over to the left side and bring your hands toward the floor. Avoid using momentum – be sure to control the motion. To complete one set, continue twisting from the right to the left side.

30 Bicycles crunches

Lie flat on the floor with your lower back pressed to the ground and contract your core muscles.With your hands gently holding your head, lift your knees to about a 45-degree angle. Slowly, at first, go through a bicycle pedal motion.Alternately touching your elbows to the opposite knees as you twist back and forth.

15 Obliques v-ups (R)

Lie on your left side, legs angled 30 degrees from your hips. Rest your left arm on the floor and put your right hand behind your head . Lift your straight legs off the floor, bringing your torso toward your legs . Slowly return to start. That's one rep.

20 Reverse Crunches

Lie on the floor and place hands on the floor or behind the head.

Bring the knees in towards the chest until they're bent to 90 degrees, with feet together or crossed. Contract the abs to curl the hips off the floor, reaching the legs up towards the ceiling. Lower and repeat for 1-3 sets of 12-16 reps.It's a very small movement, so try to use your abs to lift your hips rather than swinging your legs and creating momentum.

15 Obliques v-ups (L)

Lie on your left side, legs angled 30 degrees from your hips. Rest your left arm on the floor and put your right hand behind your head . Lift your straight legs off the floor, bringing your torso toward your legs . Slowly return to start. That's one rep.

References:  www.passion4profession.net, wiki.com, www.workout-x.com. The 300 abs can be found all over the internet- bodybuilding.com, muscle and fitness.

As with all forms of exercise, you should consult with your physician or healthcare professional before undertaking any of the fitness training discussed in this blog. Any application of the techniques, ideas, and suggestions in this blog should be used as a guideline. Always do a proper warm-up, stretch, and cooldown

5 Day Ab Challenge: Day 4

Pyramid Abs

50 sec plank

Get into pushup position on the floor.
Now bend your elbows 90 degrees and rest your weight on your forearms. Your elbows should be directly beneath your shoulders, and your body should form a straight line from your head to your feet.

40 Toe Touches

Stretch out on the ground. Legs vertical. Arms wide open and palms facing the ceiling.Raise your trunk keeping your legs as firmly as possible in the same position.Try to touch the outside of your ankles with your fingers.

30 Pulse Up Crunch

Curl up and forward so that your head, neck, and shoulder blades lift off the floor. A pulse means not lowering the head back to floor, but instead stopping halfway down and lifting back up. A pulse should resemble the crunch without the head returning to the floor.

20 Side Lying Crunch (R)

Lie on your right side with your legs on top of each other with your knees bent. Place your left hand on the side of your head. Crunch up with your side as high as you can, focusing on the movement to work the obliques as much as possible.

10 In's/Out's

Lay flat on the ground. Imagine a vertical line which starts from your pelvis. Contract your abdomen and bring your shoulders and knees towards the imaginary line. It is very important to keep the pelvis still during the exercise. Return to the starting position.

20 Side Lying Crunch (L)

Lie on your right side with your legs on top of each other with your knees bent. Place your left hand on the side of your head. Crunch up with your side as high as you can, focusing on the movement to work the obliques as much as possible.

30 Pulse Up Crunch

Curl up and forward so that your head, neck, and shoulder blades lift off the floor. A pulse means not lowering the head back to floor, but instead stopping halfway down and lifting back up. A pulse should resemble the crunch without the head returning to the floor.

40 Toe Touches

Stretch out on the ground. Legs vertical. Arms wide open and palms facing the ceiling.Raise your trunk keeping your legs as firmly as possible in the same position.Try to touch the outside of your ankles with your fingers.

50 sec plank

Get into pushup position on the floor.
Now bend your elbows 90 degrees and rest your weight on your forearms. Your elbows should be directly beneath your shoulders, and your body should form a straight line from your head to your feet.

References:  www.passion4profession.net, wiki.com, www.workout-x.com, and others. All these exercises were found on the internet.

As with all forms of exercise, you should consult with your physician or healthcare professional before undertaking any of the fitness training discussed in this blog. Any application of the techniques, ideas, and suggestions in this blog should be used as a guideline. Always do a proper warm-up, stretch, and cooldown

5 Day Ab Challenge: Day 3

3 Rounds, Little to No Rest

Flutter Kicks- 30 reps (15 each side)

Start by lying flat on your back on a mat with your arms by your sides and your palms down. Extend your legs fully out with a slight bend in your knees. Lift your heels about 6 inches off the floor. Make small, rapid up and down scissor-like motions with your legs. The key is to focus on having your midsection do all the work and to keep your abs constantly contracted throughout the exercise.

Side v-ups- 20 reps (10 each side)

Lie on your side with your bottom arm laid out beside you and the other arm held beside your head. Crunch up towards your hip and raise both legs at the same time contracting your oblique's  at the top of the motion. Lower both your legs and upper body back down to the floor and repeat.

Push Through- 30 reps

The focus of this exercise is to push the hands inside the legs. As you push through, contract your abdomen voluntarily to obtain the best possible result.

References:  www.passion4profession.net, wiki.com, www.workout-x.com

As with all forms of exercise, you should consult with your physician or healthcare professional before undertaking any of the fitness training discussed in this blog. Any application of the techniques, ideas, and suggestions in this blog should be used as a guideline. Always do a proper warm-up, stretch, and cooldown

5 day Ab Challenge: Day 2

Routine 1

Starfish Toe Touches : 20 sec, Recovery  10 sec

Lie face up with your arms and legs extended. Separate your arms slightly wider than your shoulders and your legs wider than your hips. Crunch up, lifting your shoulders as you raise your legs 45 degrees off the floor. Put your right hand behind your head and lift your right leg as you reach your left arm toward it. Return to starting position; repeat on the opposite side to complete 1 rep. (Keep shoulders and legs raised the entire time.)

Alternating Beats Abs : 20 sec , Recovery  10 sec

Lie on the ground, with your legs and shoulders raised slightly so that your abdomen remains tense throughout the exercise. Raise and lower your feet one at a time. Keep your legs slightly bent so that your abdomen does most of the work, rather than your quadriceps.
Rotation Oblique Crunch :20 sec, Recovery  10 sec

Legs completely stretched out and one hand behind the head. Raise your trunk while it rotates in the direction of the opposite leg. At the same time, move the leg closer carrying the knee parallel to the pelvis. Return to the starting position.

Reverse Abs :20 sec, Recovery  10 sec, Recovery  10 sec,

Back supported on the ground, shoulders tensed and raised but with the neck kept relaxed. Legs vertical and bent. Keep your back still, contract the abdomen and push the knees as far as possible towards the chest. Return to the starting position.
Repeat Routine 1

Routine 2

V-ups : 20 sec ,Recovery  10 sec

Lie down on a flat surface or mat. Start with your legs straight, then come up. Touch your toes, and then let your torso fall back down. Bring your legs up into the air, touching your toes again

Bicycle Crunches :20 sec, Recovery  10 sec

Lie flat on the floor with your lower back pressed to the ground and contract your core muscles. With your hands gently holding your head, lift your knees to about a 45-degree angle.  Slowly, at first, go through a bicycle pedal motion. Alternately touching your elbows to the opposite knees as you twist back and forth.

Scissors :20 sec, Recovery 10 sec

Lie down on your back with the length of your spine pressed firmly against the floor. Position your hands palms down under your hips. Pull your lower abdominal muscles in toward your spine as you lift your legs about a foot off the floor. Open your legs to a V shape and then criss cross your legs so that your right leg moves in front of your left leg and then left leg moves in front of your right leg.

Russian Twists: 20 sec, Recovery  10 sec

Start out sitting on the floor with your knees bent so that you can place your feet flat on the ground. Lean back so that your body is in a 45-degree angle,, while keeping your back straight. Raise your feet up until your lower legs are parallel to the floor. Balancing your weight on your glutes, bend your elbows and clasp your hands together in front of your chest. Twist your torso to the right side and try to bring your hands as close as you can to the floor. Move only your upper body while keeping your abdominals engaged throughout the motion. Finally, twist over to the left side and bring your hands toward the floor. Avoid using momentum – be sure to control the motion. To complete one set, continue twisting from the right to the left side.

Repeat Routine 2

References:  www.passion4profession.net, wiki.com, www.workout-x.com


As with all forms of exercise, you should consult with your physician or healthcare professional before undertaking any of the fitness training discussed in this blog. Any application of the techniques, ideas, and suggestions in this blog should be used as a guideline. Always do a proper warm-up, stretch, and cooldown

5 day ab challenge. Day 1

Foot to Foot Crunch – 30 reps
Stretch out on the ground with your shoulders and head raised in a way that keeps your abdomen constantly tensed up. Raise your trunk a little further and at the same time fold it over on one side until your hand can reach over to touch your foot. Return to the starting position and execute the same movement on the other side.
 Alternating Curls – 30 reps
 Lie on the ground, with your shoulders raised slightly so that your upper abdomen remains tense throughout the exercise. Position your feet slightly apart with respect to your pelvis. Raise your upper torso, rotating it slightly to one side, while simultaneously moving the opposite knee in the same direction. Try to keep your knee at the same angle as you move it towards your upper torso. Return to the starting position and repeat on other side
Recovery – 30 seconds
Push Through – 30 reps
 The focus of this exercise is to push the hands inside the legs. As you push through, contract your abdomen voluntarily to obtain the best possible result.
Leg Lifts– 30 reps
Lie down on your back. Raise your legs about 5 cm from the ground. Breathe in and lift up the first leg until you form an angle of about 75 degrees, contracting your stomach as you do so. Breathe out when your leg is in a vertical position. Perform the same movement for the other leg. One at a time, return your legs to the starting position, breathing out as you lower them. Carry out the entire exercise in 4 beats.
 Recovery – 30 seconds
 Arm Reaching Crunch – 30 reps
 Lie on the ground, with your head slightly raised, your neck relaxed and your abdomen contracted. Position your feet slightly apart with respect to your pelvis. Keep your shoulder and back muscles relaxed. Contract your abdomen as much as you can, moving your upper torso towards your knees in one slow, smooth movement, avoiding sudden jerks. Slowly and gradually return to the starting position.
Toe Touches – 30 reps
Stretch out on the ground. Legs vertical. Arms wide open and palms facing the ceiling.Raise your trunk keeping your legs as firmly as possible in the same position.Try to touch the outside of your ankles with your fingers.
 Recovery – 30 seconds
 Cross Arm Crunch – 30 reps 
Lie down on the ball so that it fills the space which goes from your buttocks up to your shoulder blades. Neck relaxed. The upper part of your trunk is gently bent back behind you. Contract the abdomen and bring it back in line with the rest of your body. Return to the starting position.
In's/Out's – 30 reps
Lay flat. Imagine a vertical line which starts from your pelvis. Contract your abdomen and bring your shoulders and knees towards the imaginary line. It is very important to keep the pelvis still during the exercise. Return to the starting position.

References:  www.passion4profession.net, wiki.com, www.workout-x.com

As with all forms of exercise, you should consult with your physician or healthcare professional before undertaking any of the fitness training discussed in this blog. Any application of the techniques, ideas, and suggestions in this blog should be used as a guideline. Always do a proper warm-up, stretch, and cooldown

Chris's Journey #35: Starting Over

“It’s never too late to start your life over.”- Judy Vilmain

It was March 4, 2011, my 37th birthday and I was depressed. I was 37 years old and nothing had come to pass the way I thought it would. If you asked me as a 25 year old where I saw myself in ten or so years, I would have said the following: “A beautiful wife, 2 amazing kids, and working with kids in a church as their youth minister. We would not have a lot of money, but we will be a happy family.” At 37 I had none of that. No wife, no kids, no youth ministry position. Wait, I did have something from that dream, no money. I was not happy. I was at my heaviest weight, 481 pounds. My heart ached because love had not swept me off my feet. My soul ached because I was not doing the job that I felt God created me for. I was so overweight, I hated myself. I hated everything I did, I hated everything I became. I just wanted a do over. I wanted to hit the reset button and be able to start over brand new.

Now for the record I was not suicidal. Thank God I had family and friends that grounded me enough to where I knew how much I was needed in this life. I did feel overwhelmed with the fact that my life was so messed up that I would never be normal. Never be healthy. Never be loved. Never love myself. But if there was a reset button on the “The Legend of Chris Hollister” video game, I would have hit it and started over again and not thought twice about it. But there are no reset buttons in real life. So because I saw no way out, I never saw myself losing the weight. I never saw myself getting married. I never saw myself taking care and loving me. I had hit rock bottom.

It is amazing what has happened in three years. I weighed myself today and I am at 384.5 pounds, 65.5 pounds lost since January and 96.5 pounds lost since 2011. I cannot remember when the last time I was at that weight. I do not exercise as much as I should, but I do exercise more than I thought I ever would. I have walked eight 5Ks, and I plan on walking more. I eat less than 1,000 calories a day and I am not wanting or starving for more. I had a surgery I thought I never would have. I have so much support from my family, friends, and even people I do not know about. I feel healthier than I have been in ten years. As of 6/24/2014, I am learning to love myself and I feel amazing! I am starting to think that I can get to my dream, just a little late to the party.

Starting over is not easy. Starting over can be described as hard. To me, I believe that starting over can be worth it. I am not sure where my life will take me in the next few years. I am not sure if I will be married, or have kids. I am not sure I will be working with youth again. But I am seeing something for the first time. I am able to finally see myself healthy. It used to be when I looked in to the future all I saw was clouds and dark shadows. I could not see my future. I took it to say I did not have a future. But now I do see it, as a healthy man. I see myself walking and swimming and working out. I see myself on amusement park rides. I see myself playing with my nephews. I see myself active and I see myself alive and healthy. It is an amazing vision to see now. I cannot wait to get there.

Life is harsh and sometime dark. You sometimes cannot see three feet in front of you. But never count out the fact that you can start over. You can improve your quality of life. You can learn to love yourself. You do have to focus and you do have to work hard at it, but it is there if you want it bad enough. Then when you do decide you want it bad enough, tell everyone about it. FULL DISCLOSURE. Leave out no details. The reason you do that is to have people see and believe in your progress both good and bad. It is so hard to backslide when everyone knows your progress. This one part has helped me so much. Is it difficult to do full disclosure? Yes it is, but it is completely worth it!

So where do I see myself now in ten years? I see myself healthy and loving myself and loving my life.

Chris's Journey #34 : The Phantom Menaces

Heaviest Weight: 481. January 2014 Weight: 450. Surgery Weight: 426. Current Weight: 389. Miles Walked: 129.4 miles. Hours Walked 49 Hours 32 Minutes. Times Walked: 70. I have been cleared to walk for the past 2 weeks, and I have not been doing it. I told myself that after the surgery was over with that I would not be lazy. I would work hard and get this weight down. And after the surgery I really wanted to move around. I got restless and wanted to move. I got excited because, I figured this is what I would be like from here on out. I was wrong. A week and a half ago, my doctor gave me the approval to start walking (not work out). I was excited and set my alarm early to get up and walk. The next day, the alarm went off and I went back to sleep. The next day, I did the same thing, falling back in to old lazy habits. It is easy not to do something. It is easy to sit there or sleep in for another 20 minutes. The hard part is getting up strapping on those shoes and getting out there. People ask me what is my secret to getting out there and walking. To be honest, I do not have one. I really wish I did. I wish there was an on and off switch inside all of us that allows us to work out and walk or run anytime we needed to. Or an automatic switch like automatic sprinklers that just turned on and got us moving. There is not one of those. It takes one day of saying, I have to do this and it is now or never. It is asking do I love myself enough to sacrifice sleep or time with a spouse or something important and to exercise and move. Accountability partners help, but the only person you can truly be accountable for is you. I truly wish there was another way, but there is not. If we do not take it upon ourselves then the phantom menace of laziness or procrastination will take over and we (or I) will never do it. The last two days I have gotten up, strapped my shoes on and walked. It is time to create a new habit and not a lazy one. The other phantom menace I still have is the scale. I gave myself a 2 week moratorium from weighing in because the last weigh in did not give me the results I wanted and I was angry. My counselor made the suggestion to not weigh in for two weeks. I protested as soon as she made the recommendation. I protested hard until I saw what I was saying. I saw myself falling in to that addiction all over again. But this time my addiction was not food, but an obsession of a number on a scale. The decision was easy and I have not weighted myself until today. But before my weigh in, I remembered a conversation I had with a friend last week. She is in Overeaters Anonymous and she battles the ups and downs of food addiction just like I do. She told me something very powerful that her sponsor told her, “Your weight is actually none of your business”. The sponsor explained that as long as you are following your plan and doing the things that you needed to do, that God was in control and He would take care of the rest. To me, that was very comforting. I realized something that I had not thought of in weeks. The weight is NOT important. The health IS important. So today when I weighed myself I told myself that this scale does not show my worth. God thinks I am worthy, so I am worthy. My family and friends think I am worthy, so I am worthy. I think I am worthy, so I am worthy. And I got on the scale confident that the number did not define me. My life defines who I am. I took the power back from the scale. The scale no longer defines me. I define me. Be aware of the phantom menaces in your life. And also be aware that you are more than those issues. You are special and worthy, and if you want it bad enough, you can accomplish anything. Even walking or getting on and off a scale. Sincerely, Chris

Chris's Journey #33: The Battle for Me Part 6: Who I Am Hates Who I’ve Been

Issue #33 The Battle for Me Part 6: Who I Am Hates Who I’ve Been

It has now been a month since the life changing surgery that I had. It has been a month of figuring out who I am as a person who is healing and getting healthy. It has been a month of figuring out what I can and cannot eat. It has been a long month of accepting a lifetime of actions that I have put upon myself. It has been a life changing month and a month I wish to never repeat, but I am so glad that I have gone through it and am standing on my own two feet again.

I bring about my faith in this blog from time to time because it is an important part of my story. My faith in God and belief in Christ is what makes me, me. With that in mind I bring in one of my favorite quotes in the Bible, as well as a quote from a song from the group Relient K.

“I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.” – Romans 7:15

The verse in Romans explains perfect of the food addicted male that I am. I have known for the past 15 years or so that I was slowly killing myself with the food that I ate and ate. I knew I needed to eat healthier. I knew I needed to exercise more. I knew I needed to cut back servings. And I did none of those. To this day, I cannot explain why I ate the extra pizza, or ate a whole 20 piece McNuggets with a large fry. I am unable to explain the 2000 to 3000 calories I drank in Cokes and sweet tea every day. I am unable to explain why I put my body through hell while I stretched my skin out of proportion, made every part of me round, and made myself almost unrecognizable to the friends and loved ones I have. Why I kept eating that led me to lose friends that I had for years because they could not take seeing me kill myself just a little bit more. And why I hated myself all the more while taking every single extra bite of food. I wish I could explain it, but I cannot. “I know what I want to do, I do not do, but what I hate I do.”

Now for the Relient K verse, which takes what Paul (the author of Romans) wrote and adds a bit more.

“I'm sorry for the person I became. I'm sorry that it took so long for me to change. I'm ready to be sure I never become that way again 'cause who I am hates who I've been. Who I am hates who I've been.” – Relient K

The song is a prayer to God, praying for forgiveness for the wrong they did. That is what I am doing here. I have this prayer on a regular basis with God, asking for forgiveness for wasting the body He gave me and in essence wasting the life He gave me. But I am putting this here to ask forgiveness to my friends who love me so much and worried about me for so many years. I ask forgiveness for my family who felt they could never talk to me about my weight and how they truly felt about it. I ask forgiveness to myself for not just hurting myself physically, but emotionally and spiritually. Who I am hates who I have been. But the word that needs to be put in bold and have flashing letters on it is BEEN.

I was that person, and I am not that person any longer. Now it is time for me to be the man that God wants me to be. Now is the time to me to achieve all the wonderful things in life my friends and family want me to achieve. Now it is time to be happy with the person I am instead of tearing myself down. It is time to get past this surgery as a stop in my journey and get on with the journey. It is time to get walking again. It is time to get to the next stage of this journey of mine. Next stop: Healthy, population me.

Sincerely, Chris

Chris's Journey #32: Why Does This Inanimate Object Frustrate Me So?

If you were tuning in to this week’s blog to read the final chapter of my “Battle for Me” series, you are going to have to wait one more week. I feel really bad about that, but I had to talk about something else. Something that has been really frustrating and slowly overtaking my life the past 3 weeks since the surgery. That something is the scale. I know I talked about it briefly last week, but I really need to go in to more detail of what happened over the course of the past 2 weeks.

As you know, I had the scale snafu 2 weeks ago where I decided to weigh myself early and I got super frustrated. Well this is an addendum to that. I weighed myself last Tuesday (May 27th) and saw that I lost ONLY 3 pounds. I highlight the ONLY because that was what was in my head. I was so angry and frustrated when I saw the scale only showing 3 pounds lost. I even tried to shift my body on the scale in hopes that maybe my body was not resting properly and shifting will help me lose another pound or two. All the shifting in the world would not help. The scale has no emotion, no feelings, it is just cold and calculating (literally) and it still showed me as 3 pounds lost. So I put my head down in shame and left the gym trying to figure out what I did wrong.

There were reasons why three pounds was a disaster. First, three pounds is an amazing amount to lose without the surgery. If I lost three pounds in a week before the surgery, I would be high fiving and chest bumping everyone. It would have been an amazing day. But this weigh in was after the surgery. I was still only eating 900 calories or less each day the past week. With having a surgery where an amazing trained professional (Dr. Arun Rao…if you get the surgery done, have Dr. Rao do it…not a paid promotional advertisement…I just really think she is amazing) cut in to me and remove 2/3 of my stomach. Also in the support groups that I participate in online, I saw some amazing numbers from men and women in all walks of life. I figured I would be losing 7 to 10 pounds a week. Especially if I followed the plan, which I was. So to see only three pounds, was so hard.

Plus 2 weeks ago I was 405 pounds. Losing three pounds meant I was then at 402. Still in the 400’s. I hate the 400’s. I wanted to be done with them forever.

So yesterday, I got on the scale again. On my scheduled day, just like I was supposed to. And what did the weight say? 399 pounds. Hey congrats Chris, you are out of the dreaded 400s forever! But did I see that? No I did not. I saw that I had lost only three pounds again. Was I excited to be in 300 land for the first time in probably 7 to 8 years? Nope, not at all. I was angry. I was hurt. I wanted to cry (I did not, thank you very much). 3 pounds again?? UGH!!! What am I doing wrong?

After the previous week’s 3 pounds and not crossing in to the 300’s, I decided to do a couple of things. First, I decided it was time to use MyFitnessPal again and track all my food. I really should have done this from the beginning because of all the protein I have to take in. I never liked tracking my food, so I didn’t at first. I need to be getting in at least 80 grams of protein each day and MyFitnessPal makes tracking that so easy. Next I focused on the protein and getting in 60 ounces of fluids each day. Before the surgery, 60 ounces of fluids was super easy. In an after surgery world, it is very difficult. I figured by tracking and working on protein and fluids that I should be able to knock this week out of the ball park. Fast forward to yesterday and three pounds, and let the self-beating up begin!

To my friend’s credit they all tried to snap me out of my funk. Francesca reminded me how far I had come. My friend Lauren reminded me that 3 pounds a week for a year was 156 pounds…which would be amazing. My friend Melissa told me that this was amazing and she was proud of me. When I posted my new weight total to FB I had scores of wonderful people give me love and support. I was not shaking it. It was not until lunch with my buddy Jonathan that everyone’s words finally caught up to me. Plus Jonathan gave me a nice verbal smack upside the head to tell me to snap out of it. I am so grateful to everyone for the kind words and helping me get out of my funk.

I wish I did not let the scale get to me as badly as it does. I wish I was able to celebrate every pound lost (51 pounds so far, 27 pounds since surgery) like I use to celebrate every pound lost before the surgery. But it just feels like the stakes are higher now. There is no going back to my former life. Failure is not an option this time. I am so tired of being morbidly obese Chris. I want desperately now to be active and fit Chris. As much as I want that however, I cannot be obsessed with my weight and that scale. It is not healthy, it is not smart, and it will do nothing but hurt me. The scale is to be a tool in tracking my progress and not the end all be all. I at least know what I am talking to my counselor about this week.

I am sure there are a lot of you out there like me. I pray that some of you read this and see you are not alone in feeling beaten up by inanimate object and a very real you. I am going to continue to fight not to beat myself up for what the scale says. I hope you do not too. The scale has no power over me. God and I are the only ones that have power over me and not a scale.

Sincerely, Chris