Tell It To Me Tuesday: Chris's Journey #3

Today Chris and I walked up the second level of the parking garage, and did a little zigzagging around the garage. He thought it would look cool on the runtastic app, except that we had no reception at all while in the garage. He ended up doing over 1.78 miles, and felt good! Oh, and he did his first band upper body workout! Video coming soon! Whoop! Whoop! Read below to keep up with his journey and progress!

My Grandmother always would say to me, “I love you and I like you”. The variant of that would be when I was in trouble was, “I will always love you, but I will not always like you”. If I could talk to myself most of the time it would be, “I do not love you, and I really do not like you”.

So, I have a horrible self-image of myself. No matter how fat and overweight you see me as being, I see myself as twice that and then some. I was thinking of that to myself on Day 9 of this journey I am beginning. I started the walk and the usual was happening. My feet were hurting, my legs were hurting, and I did not have a proper music play list. I was just whiny. A few steps in to it, I was telling myself to just turn around. There is always tomorrow. As Admiral Akbar would say, “IT’S A TRAP!”

The “there is always tomorrow “is my trap. I cannot tell you how many changes to my eating habits I did not begin or how many exercise routines I did not start, because there was always tomorrow. If it was not tomorrow, it was let’s start Monday; it is the beginning of the week. If it was not tomorrow, or Monday, then it was we will start at the beginning of the month. Tomorrow, Monday, beginning of the month, it did not matter to me. I was not going to start it. It is because I did not have the love or liking of myself to begin. If you love someone, you (within reason) will do anything for them. Whether it is picking them up at the airport at 1 AM, or house sitting for them at the last minute, or even helping someone by driving out at midnight to fix a flat tire, if it is important we are there. So the thought frequently goes in my head, “you like them that much you will do that, but you do not like yourself enough to not got for a short walk”?

So the thought in my head at the beginning of this walk was I can do this tomorrow. After all there was football to be watched (although it was bad Gator football). It was a busy day, I needed to rest. Rest is good for you. Your feet hurt Chris, you should not walk with your feet hurting. All the excuses were there. I could have taken any of them. I could have taken all of them. But then the statement my Grandmother made to me came in to my head. “I love you and I like you”. Then my orders became clear. It was time to walk.

Day 9 was a hard 1.6 miles. I hurt afterwards. But I still did it. I was tired afterwards. But I still did it. Several friends on Facebook posted a picture of this overweight guy walking on to my site. The caption with the overweight guy was, “No matter how slow you go, you are still lapping everyone on the couch”. That was true. All those people watching the game. I was lapping them. Chris 9 walking days ago, I lapped him. I was lapping everyone except the nice old lady that had her dog bark at me really loud. She was lapping me, but I let her…that dog was weird.

OK, back to the blog. In this journey, I have to learn to love myself. If I do not this entire journey is for naught. When you love someone you will do anything for them. Right now, I would do anything for my friends and family, but not for me. I need to love myself so that I will do anything for me to keep me safe. I need to love me to keep me healthy. I need to love me to keep me walking.

I love you and I like you. Day 9 complete. I am hoping for day 10.

Also, I am no longer 455 pounds. I am 453 pounds. I love you and I like you Chris.

Sincerely,

Chris