Chris Journey #44: I am a Ferrari! Or a Mercedes!

“Do you not know that your body is a tempe of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?” 1 Corinthians 6:19

“Honor God with your body” 1 Corinthians 6:20

“You treat your body like a temple. I treat mine like a tent.” – Jimmy Buffet, Fruitcakes

During service last Sunday, my pastor Jason Cullum gave an amazing sermon on why it is important for us to take care of our one body. Our bodies, our lives are the one of first gift God gives to us. Jason gave very good points on how we feel compelled to speak to someone if they are drinking too much, or even if we know someone is cheating on their spouses. However if we see someone constantly eating too much, we will not say anything to them. Now Jason was not meaning to pick on people who are overweight or obese, but he was saying that it is our responsibility to our brothers and sisters to discuss with them concerns when we are hurting our bodies.

Jason continued to give an excellent example on the differences between owning a Ferrari and owning a 1980 Mazda 626 (his first car). If we owned the Ferrari, we would do everything in our powers to take care of it. We would put a tarp on it, house it in a garage, and make sure that it was clean and tuned up and ready to perform. What about his Mazda 626? Well it had garbage in it, it was always dirty, and if a ding got on it, no big deal. So if God gave us a Ferrari body (well I was thing Porsche or Mercedes) then why are we treating our bodies like that 1980 Mazda 626? That point really hit home for me.

I put both verses that Jason used in the sermon at the beginning of the blog. I also put Jimmy Buffett’s verse from his song Fruitcakes. I put that verse up top because for the majority of my life I did treat my body as a tent. I did not care how I felt, how I looked, or how I was as long as I got the food inside me. I wish I could say that I did it because I loved the taste of food. That I ate nothing but the best foods. But it was neither! I did not like the taste of food. I did not eat the best foods. I ate mostly fast foods all day, every day. I ate all that I could so that I could feel full. So that I could be stuffed. That was the sensation I wanted. I wanted to be stuffed, all the time.

Because I decided not to treat my body like a temple, I sacrificed so much. I sacrificed God’s plan for me for the longest time. I sacrificed not working with teenagers (a passion of mine) for almost 10 years. I sacrificed energy to play with my nephews and Godsons. I sacrificed meaningful dating relationships. I sacrificed my self- esteem. All because I did not care about myself enough to treat myself as the Mercedes that God created me to be.

“Guilt just does not work” was the statement Jason finished the sermon with. Thankfully my friend Amanda loaned me her pen so I could write that quote down. “Guilt just does not work”. I could lament and feel guilty that I did not take care of myself for the longest time. I could heap guilt and more guilt on my conscious. But why? Why should I continue to hurt myself for my past mistakes? Haven’t I spent long enough hurting myself? I know I have. It is time to move on.

I feel like I dwell on my past way too much. Most of the time I believe that I have to keep paying the price for close to 40 years of mistakes. Why is that? Why do I feel the need to treat myself like that 1980 Mazda 626 and not like the Mercedes that God created me to be? God has a better opinion of me that I have of me. God loves me for who I am. Can’t I do just the same? Can’t I love me for me as I am now? The past is the past and it cannot be changed no matter how hard I try. And it is time to stop trying and just live my life. It is time to just be me. And that part is exciting.

My life is an unknown path now. I do not know where it will go from here on out. But I do know that I will not be the morbidly obese man I was a year ago, two years ago, or even ten years ago. I will be healthier, I will be stronger, I will be better. My body is no longer a tent or a 1980 Mazda 626. My body is under construction. My body will be a temple, a Mercedes soon enough. It will just take time and sweat to make it happen. I am super excited to see what I will be in a year from now, two years from now, and even ten years from now. No more guilt. Not more looking in the past.

I am a Ferrari. I am a Mercedes. I am worth it. Let’s see what is next. I cannot wait!

Sincerely, Chris